I didn’t use to wear colors

Colors are visible with the presence of the light, the more light there is, colors are brighter. Where there is no light there is only darkness.

I used to wear dark colors, or no colors at all. Didn’t feel comfortable wearing colors, it felt like they are not a part of me. I always wear clothes that match my inner experience, so it was quite normal for me to wear black and no color clothes from teenage years up until my mid 30thies. I wasn’t utterly gloomy person, just wasn’t aware of the colors I wear on the inside, and even if I was, I was too shy to show them… I didn’t want to stand out, but also, I couldn’t see myself as a colorful person. In my designs at that time (I worked as a web and graphic designer) I was also stingy when it comes to colors, I can see it clearly now…The only time I really enjoyed colors was in the nature, and sometimes when I was able to express them on paper, in small dosage of course… I didn’t paint that much because I had no real joy inside to express it on the outside… I didn’t like myself that much.

It was only when I “hit the bottom” in neglecting my true nature, and started a real work on myself, that I could slowly get rid of my dark clothes and was comfortable wearing bright yellow for example, even pink… (earlier in my life I couldn’t understand how can someone wear pink 😊). I opened myself to be able to receive the light and I could finally see all the colors inside of me, and reflect them outside.

And now all I can paint is color. I never plan what I will paint, and what color to use, I just let it all out. Sometimes I get my inspiration in meditation, but mostly I am painting and meditating at the same time. And I am enjoying it. I paint all that joy on the paper, and it stays there for everybody who is open to take it in.

Colors are a part of us. They are in nature and of nature. They can make us feel good because by taking them in we become more connected with nature. Darkness is also a part of us, and we are usually afraid of letting the light in to see what ever there is in the dark… But we forget, only in the light we can see all the colors…


Come join me on a self-awareness journey through art :). My art is who I am.

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